The Lonely Toe

Last week, Greenbeans asked for an update on the Lonely Toe. So, Mr. Toe agreed to share this short documentary of a day in his sad, lonely life. Enjoy!

Mark Sanford Mistress Photo

Today the top Internet searches phrases were specifically geared to find a photo of Mark Sanford's Argentinian mistress, yet no such photos have surfaces, until now. Using my "where in SC" Google skills I was able to find such a photo and am happy to share it here first. I think I know why he finds her attractive...

Upside Down Flag Quiz

When you arrive at work and the state flag is flying upside down, should you:

A. Flee the premises, because pirates must have taken over your building;

B. Ask someone to turn all the other flags "upside down" so they appear correct to anyone hanging by their knees on monkey bars or using gravity boots;

C. Assume it's some kind of anti-tree, post-Earth Day protest and just try to ignore it, like a good SC liberal,

D. Notify your neighbors that the SC flag has been updated with the new symbols of the Feather Duster and the Toe Nail Clipping.

E. Make Your Own Caption by leaving a Comment.

Business Time

Happy 41st Birthday, Ferdlings!

Today was the 41st Birthday of Ferdlings (aka Paul). As a special treat, I offer this spoof of one of his classic YouTube films. The original Shaving of the Beard can be seen here. If you've not seen it, you must for my video to even be remotely humorous. In fact, I'm not certain mine is funny at all, but nevertheless, here it is...

Basic Instructions - How to develop an invention

I love this guy's comics, but this one is especially hilarious to me.

George is...

Here's a game I saw on Rick's and Charlotte's blogs (I've been catching up on my blog reading today): You take your name, google it as "[Your name] is" with the quotation marks, and see what comes up. Cut/paste the fun phrases into a post, and then do it again with google images and post that image (unless it's inappropriate, then just email it to me.)

• George is not a ‘great dancer.’
• George is immortalized
• George is remembered largely for the extravagant lifestyle that he maintained as prince and monarch.
• Lonesome George is not alone among Galápagos tortoises.
• George is a bit socially crippled, really.
• George is not human.
• George is finding it harder to blend into the college basketball scene.
• 7-foot-7 George is a big work in progress.
• George is still wrong.
• George is conducting an experiment on the ownership rights of downloaded music.
• George is too big to fit behind the wheel of a car.
• George Is Back Stateside but Still in Serious Mode.
• George is thus "Controller Ordinary of Wars", with the title of "Écuyer".
• George is the best comedy writer in Hollywood.
• "George is getting upset."
• George is careful not to play the same cities each year.
• George is better known as Uranus.
• George is drawn into a frenetic interspecies dispute...
• George" is a treat to just watch.

New Sweat Pants!

My wife, Jennifer, needed some new sweat pants to wear at the gym. So while at WalMart recently, she hurriedly grabbed some red ones from the rack. It wasn't until she got home that she noticed that something was printed accross the rear. "M.I.A. Since 2 A.M.". Apparently, we're too old/unhip to even understand what this means. Nevertheless, she refuses to wear them to the gym OR to model them for this blog photo.

UPDATE: My pal, Chuck B., sent me the following photo. Apparently, he was able to get the sweat pant autographed. Thanks, Chuck.

I'm A Man! I'm Forty!

My brother and sister-in-law sent me this video clip as a birthday gag. Since I'm turning 40 tomorrow, I'm going to act like this guy all day. After all, he's a man, he's "40".

Caption: Mike Gundy, head football coach at Oklahoma State, freaks out at a press conference.

Mr. Bean's Chistmas

AGE-O-MATIC!

My sister-in-law turned me on to some cool new web technology on CareerBuilder.com. Their Age-O-Matic will show you what you will look like at retirement. Here's several different versions of me.

Eli Parker is Getting Married?

Thursday night I went back to P.C. to see my old college buddy, Mark Jones, who was there for a showing of his independent film, Eli Parker is Getting Married?. I was really impressed with his film, but I was especially happy to visit with an old friend who I haven't seen in about 10 years.

Mark and I were good friends all through college. We were in FCA, Bible studies, and proud Smyth Dorm residents together. We climbed to the top of Neville Hall on night to touch the "Nipple of Knowledge" (Legend had it that anyone who touched the Nipple of Knowledge would make a 4.0 that year. This turned out to be a myth.) I recall that we even double-dated and/or took dates to the same dances and stuff occasionally. So, when Mark came out of the closet, about five years after we graduated, I was really shocked. In fact, I really didn't even believe it at first. At it's core, Eli Parker is Getting Married? is about that very topic, a comic story about a gay guy coming out of the closet to his old college friend years later and the friends reaction. (Of, course, there's more to it than that and it's hilarious.)

I know that every artist wants to touch someones soul and although I doubt Mark was trying to send a message specifically to me or all his old friends, it did make me realize that my initial reaction wasn't really unusual and that it definitely wasn't the barrier to our friendship that I thought it might be. I've always been a bit ashamed of how I reacted to my friend when he bravely decided to share his deepest secret. I won't pretend to understand the whole "Gay thing" and I probably never will. However, seeing this film and talking with Mark about it afterwards helped me forgive myself for a temporary lapse in friendship. Thanks Mark, your film made an impact on me.

Mark has a new film, Fraternity Massacre at Hell Island, making its rounds at film festivals. Apparently, it's a "fun B horror movie." Although I haven't seen this one yet, I suspect that this film will probably make me feel less guilty about all those fraternity guys we killed back in college. (Just Kidding) Below is a clip from the movie.

Click here for Eli Parker is Getting Married? on IMDB.

Click here for Fraternity Massacre at Hell Island on IMDB.

Mmmm, That Really IS Good Coffee....

I had a blast Tuesday filling up Rick's Blog with comments. Thanks, Rick.

The Tony Campolo in.Justice Tour

Tony Campolo's in.Justince Tour is coming to my church on November 18th (6:00pm to 8:30pm). It also features my good friend Wade Joye, leading Worship music, and Curt Cloninger (an Amazing One Man Theatre).

Tickets are $5 and seating is limited, so reserve your tickets online if you're interested in attending. You can book online here or call: 803-359-3495

Paul, Driving Around and Singing.

This is hilarious! Paul Reaves, my good-old college roommate and former fellow band member (Children at Heart) put this video on YouTube and his blog. I enjoyed it so much I just had to put it on my blog too.

Operators are standing by...

This is an oldie, but a goodie...

Happy Labor Day

Basic Instructions

I've recently posted some hilarious comic strips by Scott Meyer, called Basic Instructions. Well, last week, after the 2007 Miss Teen USA embarrassment, I submitted a recommendation that he consider doing one on "How to answer a tough question during a Beauty Padget". Below is his reply:

Microsoft's answer to the iPhone

Miss South Carolina Stuns the Audience at the 2007 Miss Teen USA Padget

I saw another version of this clip on Rick's Blog and just couldn't resist putting it on mine. Enjoy.